wolf_princess journal

Talk about a long timesigh...

Fri, 17 Aug 2007 06:12:50 GMT

I know I know, it has been almost a year since I have actually posted on here. Right now my life is in total shambles and I am slowly trying to dig myself out of it however I can't seem to do it...I can no longer afford Aquinas College as the person who was co signing for my student loans decided on a whim that he no longer wants that responsibility, which in some ways I understand but it still doesn't make it any better. The guy that I love very much is down in Ohio however I don't know what will become of us, if anything anymore, my grandmother is dying right before my eyes and it is so hard to watch day after day. I suppose the only real good thing that I have to look forward to is my Uncle Charlie is finally getting married to the man that he loves and it joys me to see their happiness finally come to fruition. Today however was not so good a day, my cousin Leah got into a really bad car accident and was extremely lucky that she made it out alive, thank god for seatbelts, but her cousin was driving the car atleast 80 mph and just happened to hit construction to where there was a small dip in the road which made them flip over into the marsh, her cousin ended up fracturing her neck in 3 different places but they are going to be ok, the car is a total wreck. I attempted to sign up for classes at Montcalm CC however I have no way of getting to classes where ironically I will also be working, so *sigh* I may have to take another semester off of school which I really don't want to do. I feel like my dreams seem to slip further and further away from me and there is nothing that I can do about it. At this point I just want to lay down in bed and never get out of the covers and maybe then life won't be so bad. Oh well you have to take responsibility somewhere, what better place to start than getting your own life straightened out...I wish it were that easy.

The one I stole from Rob

Fri, 20 Oct 2006 15:05:08 GMT

You scored as Egyptian Pantheonic Pagan. You scored as an Egyptian Pagan. With equal draw to both men and women, the Egyptian pantheon is a wealth of ancient stories and forgotten customs. Very seductive to the more cerebral Pagans, devoting oneself to this faith often means being willing to really work on finding out who your Gods were. Never an easy undertaking. Dedicated and insightful, you know you're among good company with those who also understand your Gods.

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Egyptian Pantheonic Pagan

90%

Ecclectic Pagan

85%

Shamanic Pagan

75%

Greek Pantheonic Pagan

70%

Celtic Pantheonic Pagan

65%

Roman Pantheonic Pagan

65%

Eastern Pagan

55%

Sumerian, Babylonian, and Mesopotamian Pagans

50%

Norse Pantheonic Pagan (Asatru)

45%

Kabbalistic Pagan

30%

Zoroastrian Pagan

15%

Catholic (Pagan?)

What kind of Pagan are you?
created with QuizFarm.com

yay!!!!!

Wed, 11 Jan 2006 19:57:08 GMT

It's my birthday yay!!!!!!!!!!!!

The Survey

Mon, 12 Dec 2005 16:38:39 GMT

WHO'S BED DID YOU SLEEP IN LAST NIGHT?
My wonderful fiance's bed and it was a nice sleep too as we were all cuddled up throughout the night

WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING?
gray t-shirt that says Alma College on it

HAVE YOU MADE OUT WITH ANYONE ON YOUR FRIEND'S LIST?
Yes, Justin, Dave, and of course James

DO YOU HAVE "A THING" FOR ANYONE ON YOUR TOP 8?
My fiance (James)

HOW MANY PEOPLE ON YOUR LIST DO YOU KNOW 'IN REAL LIFE'?
all

WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW?
Matt and James in the background talking

WHAT ARE YOUR NICKNAMES?
D honey babe etc.

WHAT COLOR ARE YOUR UNDIES RIGHT NOW?
lavender

DO YOU HAVE ANY PETS?
not yet but we are getting a husky dog

WHAT'S YOUR DAD AND MOM'S MIDDLE NAME?
Dad don't know but my mom's is Mae

MOST RECENT MOVIE THAT YOU WATCHED?
The Polar Express (oh my god was it good)

NAME 3 THINGS THAT YOU HAVE ON YOU AT ALL TIMES?
My ID, clothes, and keys

WHAT'S THE COLOR OF YOUR BEDSHEETS?
baby blue

WOULD YOU RATHER GIVE OR RECEIVE A FOOT MASSAGE?
Both- I love giving massages and I love receiving them just as much.

NAME A TEACHER YOU HAD THE HOTS FOR!
My freshman year of high school I had the hots for my Biology teacher...*blush*

HOW MUCH CASH DO YOU HAVE ON YOU RIGHT NOW?
$85 (that's going to groceries)

WHO'S THE 4TH PERSON ON YOUR RECEIVED CALL LIST?
My mother

WHAT'S YOUR MAIN RINGTONE ON YOUR PHONE?
don't have one

WHAT WERE YOU D0ING AT MIDNIGHT LAST NIGHT?
cuddling up with James and going to sleep

WHAT DID THE LAST TEXT MESSAGE ON YOUR CELL PHONE SAY?
don't have a cell but will soon

ok....

Sun, 13 Nov 2005 16:59:52 GMT

I don't expect many people to understand what I am doing right now...but you know what for the first time in a long time I am truly happy...I am being selfish but you know what it's about time that I start to think about myself instead of what everyone else thinks...I am not going to give up happiness just because other people don't agree with what I am doing...I think that my life right now is coming together very nicely for once and I don't have my past haunting me nearly as much as it did and I can finally face without being afraid...

Lost

Mon, 17 Oct 2005 19:03:55 GMT

I know that I haven't updated in awhile. So here it goes...with everything that's been going on lately I feel like I am lost at sea...I love Justin but sometimes it seems that I am nothing but a burden and all I am doing is focusing on making him happy...I can't do that anymore and I need to start focusing on me...so today when he gets here and tell him that and if he doesn't take it kindly then I am going to break up with him for the time being...I am hoping against hope that we can work through this but if not then I just need the support of friends around me and the ones I have are the greatest...I want to thank you guys for being there when I need you the most and hopefully I can do the same but right now I think I need to go outside of my boundaries and make new friends in new places...I know I am probably not making any sense right now but I just want to find myself again and I don't know what to do...so I am going to do what feels right to me at the moment and if we end up breaking up stay single for awhile....although I hope it doesn't

Mon, 03 Oct 2005 15:47:06 GMT

You are a
Social Liberal
(73% permissive)

and an...
Economic Liberal
(18% permissive)

You are best described as a:

Socialist

Link: The Politics Test on Ok Cupid
Also: The OkCupid Dating Persona Test

Fri, 30 Sep 2005 14:59:56 GMT

My LiveJournal Trick-or-Treat Haul
alazon_princess goes trick-or-treating, dressed up as Roman Goddess.
archangel_omega tricks you! You get a block of wood.
constancewilhil gives you 11 mauve lime-flavoured nuggets.
crystal_enigma tricks you! You lose 10 pieces of candy!
hero_in_black tricks you! You lose 1 pieces of candy!
joehaskell1973 tricks you! You get a piece of paper.
kimbee_blue tricks you! You get a scratched CD.
lady_lana gives you 1 light yellow lemon-flavoured gummy worms.
mickey15_5 gives you 18 brown watermelon-flavoured gumdrops.
mr_dave83 gives you 10 light blue cherry-flavoured wafers.
theory_of_kaos tricks you! You lose 26 pieces of candy!
alazon_princess ends up with 3 pieces of candy, a block of wood, a piece of paper, and a scratched CD.
Go trick-or-treating! Username:
Another fun meme brought to you by rfreebern.

Yay...

Tue, 27 Sep 2005 19:45:59 GMT

For once I don't feel dizzy nauseated or in pain yay...I feel so much better today and more like I can finally handle things. Thank god that I had Justin there to help me out or I don't know what I would have done but things are going ok now...I still feel a little weak and hopefully I can start eating regular food again but I don't know I will try...hope everyone else is doing ok

Recovering...

Sun, 25 Sep 2005 23:50:38 GMT

I am recovering from my wonderful appendectimy which I had on Friday I just got out of the hospital yesterday and for once am not dizzy to where I can't concentrate. The medication that the doctor put me on makes me extremely dizzy and nauseaus so great...but I am doing better and am no longer in so pain that I can't walk which is good...the only thing I hate is being so helpless that Justin had to help me take a bath cause I was so dizzy and could barely move myself grrrrr....but he doesn't mind...my wounds still hurt but not so much when I take the pain killers...well hope everyone else is doing ok...

....

Wed, 21 Sep 2005 09:26:30 GMT

I feel horrible, right now I can't even sleep the pain is so bad. I think I might have gotten food poisoning cause my stomach is absolutely horrid and I ended up throwing up just from the pain...I don't know what to do I have a calculus test in 3 1/2 hours and I can't go feeling like this...I just want it to go away...

I dropped....

Wed, 14 Sep 2005 15:49:30 GMT

Ok this morning I went over to the Religion department in Anspach and I officially dropped Death and Dying cause there was no reason for me to take it since you know all the professor was teaching was critical thinking skills as well as writing skills that I already have...I am so disappointed cause I was really looking forward to learning about the subject grrrr...but oh well. So here I am sitting in the Anspach computer lab waiting to go to my next class which is Physical Anthropology and I can't wait till the middle of October where I get to take a trip to Cairo, Egypt to an archaelogical dig site at the pyramids I am so excited about that...the problem is is coming up with $675 to go :( hopefully I can cause the money is due next week...but enough of complaining I am actually loving school right now the only thing that I am having troubles with is Calculus since the professor can't speak english very well and she is trying to talk in practical terms AHHHH!!! bad idea when you can't speak that well...hehe... but anyway I am really loving my philosophy in literature class and my 1st research paper is on Literature and Pornography which is really interesting yay...and also my history class is great and my professor just happens to be my advisor for my major yay...so things are going really well right now even with Justin and I and it's great...well hope everyone else is having a good day...

Yikes....

Mon, 12 Sep 2005 19:03:49 GMT

Wow was today a little bit of a long day and IT ISN'T OVER. This morning I got up from the apartment and was late getting around, well I had to go straight to class which was calculus with a crazy ass professor who doesn't know how to speak english very well grrrrr....and that didn't get out till 11:00 after that I had to run to Dot's and get her up and make her breakfast and the usual and then go straight from there to my physical anthropology class at 12:00 and then after that I went to my History class at 1:00...now I am out and I still have a shit ton of studying to do for mostly Death and Dying grrrrr....I hate that professor...but what can you do? After Iget done studying I am going to the SAC with Dave and Justin and doing some swimming laps and then I get to come home and relax...hope everyone else is having a good day...

Sat, 10 Sep 2005 01:25:38 GMT

How You Are In Love

You take a while to fall in love with someone. Trust takes time.

You tend to give more than take in relationships.

You tend to get very attached when you're with someone. You want to see your love all the time.

You love your partner unconditionally and don't try to make them change.

You stay in love for a long time, even if you aren't loved back. When you fall, you fall hard.

How Are You In Love?

Your Power Color Is Lime Green

At Your Highest:

You are adventurous, witty, and a visionary.

At Your Lowest:

You feel misunderstood, like you don't fit in.

In Love:

You have a tough exterior, but can be very dedicated.

How You're Attractive:

Your self-awareness and confidence lights up a room.

Your Eternal Question:

"What else do I need in my life?"

What's Your Power Color?

Your Power Color Is Lime Green

http://www.blogthings.com/whatsyourpowercolorquiz/">What's Your Power Color?</a></div>

Your Power Color Is Lime Green

Fri, 09 Sep 2005 17:29:44 GMT

I am uber tired still...I don't know why...but last night was not a good night for me at all stupid past memories haunting me and usually that doesn't happen but oh well...so I cried while Justin held me which was nice then got to work on wonderful calculus and I don't like my prof cause she is pure Indian and she can barely speak english whatsoever...grrrrr....I am going to try and play WoW as much as possible since I am so behind everyone else cause of stupid school work...>_< but I think that I am going to take a nap before I do that and see if this tiredness can go away...hope everyone is having a nice weekend..

Mon, 05 Sep 2005 15:50:18 GMT

Yay...I got sleep last night...I took care of Dot this morning and she told me the sweetest thing ever...she said that missed me last night...I was so happy and then she started joking around with me which makes my job so much easier...I love taking care of her and I know I am going to cry and miss her when she is gone...but at least she will die comfortably...yay..today is another homework day cause I have to write a paper for Death and Dying so I won't be on WoW that much which kinda sucks since I am way behind everyone else grrrrr....but oh well...hope everyone is having a fun Labor Day cause it's back to class tomorrow yay...ja minna

long day...

Sun, 04 Sep 2005 19:53:07 GMT

Ok...today is an extremely long day...this morning I went over and took care of Dot and she was great...but I am so tired from the lack of sleep last night cause I still have so much on my mind right now...I talked with David this morning about what I saw yesterday and he thinks it is kind of a last farewell to her and what not so I am hoping beyond hope that he is right...if not then I know where I stand...oh well...For the rest of the day I have to go and study and take care of Dot one last time...yay...I hope to get some sleep tonight...if not I will be really cranky...oh well...that is all I really have to update on...hope everyone else is having a good day...ja minna

eh...

Sun, 04 Sep 2005 02:16:33 GMT

I have so much on my mind right now...earlier today I was downloading stuff from my calculus class and silly me I thought a certain window was my download page...well heh it just happened to be about Stephanie and after reading that on Justin's computer and knowing that he had it open I don't quite know what to think...heh...that kind of rocked my little world because I thought it was all done with and I wasn't even thinking whatsoever about her...well apparantely Justin was thinking differently...maybe again I am being paranoid but oh well if he is thinking about her then he should at least tell me about it instead of trying to hide things...on a better note I got my car today it is a big honker but it is a vehicle yay...my mother is being stupid again and is trying to play with people's minds and it's starting to piss me off cause I don't want to see Woody hurt again even though he still loves her...grrrrr....she is trying to weasle her way back into his life and it's not cool...oh well...that is my little spiel for tonight hope everyone else is having a good holiday weekend...ja minna

eh....

Wed, 31 Aug 2005 14:48:51 GMT

Well this week has been interesting...first day of classes was Monday and so far the only classes that seem to be a little difficult is Death and Dying and Philosophy of Literature other than that none of my classes are hard at all...I went to Intermediate Algebra this morning and I dropped the class because it is too easy for me and I need more of a challenge...so I took on Calculus which shouldn't be difficult at all...so that is my update hope everyone is having a good time with classes and such...

To pass time

Wed, 31 Aug 2005 14:45:48 GMT

so very sick...

Sun, 28 Aug 2005 16:55:48 GMT

Yesterday I was so sick and I don't know what I had...well I ended up going into the emergency room with Justin and they tested me for mono >_<...but luckily it wasn't it's just a really bad sinus infection so no getting around for me today yay...I just get to be a lazy bum all day long...well I am still hurting really bad and I can barely talk...yay for being sick...and the day before classes as well...that's another thing I am worried about is I don't want to miss first day of classes but I might have no choice in that matter...grrrr....I am a little angry at myself for that (stupid body)...but yesterday was quite an adventure while I was in bed Dave called me and asked me to help him out with moving the couch into the apartment cause no one else could so I got dressed and did that and boy did I feel really weak and as you all know I hate feeling like I can do nothing...anyway we got the couch in and then I went back to my dorm and tried to get some sleep but instead of doing that I tried to get ahold of Dorothy to let her know I wasn't able to take care of Dot last night well she finally called me back around 6ish and told me that I wasn't working anyway cause she had to train a girl as well as this morning so I felt relieved at that...so after that she kept calling like every 10 min or so and changing the schedule around for work yay...but it all worked out thank god... after that around 9ish Lana and Dave stopped over and said hi just to see how I was feeling and I was really happy to see their faces cause it made me feel a little better...well after they left I kept getting really bad shooting pains and so I went downstairs to the desk where Sara was working and told her and she suggested that I go to the hospital cause I was literally crying from all the pain...so about 11:30 Rob dropped me off at the apartment so Justin could take me to the hospital...while we were there a couple of girls came in from the Wayside and someone slipped something in this girl's drink and she was flipping out and spasming and so I sat in the waiting room listening to a couple of older people bashing college students and asking why they even come to school in the first place...well grrrr....I am here to get an education I don't know about anyone else...but that's all for now...hope at least everyone else is having a good day...

straight back to life....

Tue, 23 Aug 2005 00:10:41 GMT

ok...so this past weekend I went to GenCon with Justin, Jared, and Kim...I had a lot of fun except that Kim got really bummed out on Friday because she chose not to go to her event even though Justin and I tried to encourage her...we also ended up missing RA Salvatore's seminar but that was because the guys were late getting up and around...well Kim still got to get her book signed and I am really happy about that...I will say this I LOVE LARP'S if you don't know what that is it is live action role playing...teehee I played a seductive vampire it was awesome and I want to do it again...so I am keeping my character for next year...I met this really awesome guy that made his own RPG of the early 20's mafia and I got to play with him in the LARP and oh my god is he good at it...but we got home at 6:00 in the morning on Sunday and I got a little bit of sleep and a few hours later I moved into my dorm room (Barnes 318) and I love it here but right after I moved in I went straight to Safari which I am currently on break from at the moment, but it's like I get no break at all and I am kinda upset about that...grrrr....but I am still having a great time with and getting a lot of good experience from it as well...all the speakers that we have are all comics so it's great...I saw Rene Hicks this morning and it was awesome...and I got to see a couple of good friends as well and so I am hanging out with them while I am here too...not quite ready for classes to begin next week but that is ok I think I am pretty prepared for them...well that is all that I have to update on so I will ttyl...hope everyone is having a nice night...

Just one of those days...

Sun, 07 Aug 2005 02:23:12 GMT

Today has been a really long day as has been this week as well...I am still trying to deal with the fact that my mother is being a total dumbass but that is her perogative...while Justin was at Ozzfest on Thursday in between my final exams my mother decided to show up at the apartment with none other than the total asshole of my life...Larry...I say that with the utmost disgustedness...I would not let him in the apartment but according to my mother she is just trying to make peace between me and Larry (which is never ever going to happen) but that has been on my mind so I don't think I did so hot on my World Politics exam which makes me sad cause I studied so hard for it too...well anyway after exams I went down and spent the night with my grandma which she was really happy to see me and I was glad but then my family decided to show up and called me selfish for acting the way I was with this whole issue...I got so angry...but I locked the door as I went down there to see them and Justin of course had to come home before I did and so he was locked out and had to get Shauna to let him in and so I feel really guilty for that...and of course today I was just really moody and bitchy and now I feel even more guilty for that so I tried to make it up to Justin by giving him a back rub with sandalwood rose massage oil from bath and body works...I don't know maybe tonight I will do something more for him so I won't get bitchy...I don't know I am just so worn out from this whole ordeal I just don't know what to do anymore...and come to find out my mother lied even more and told Woody that she was going to stay with him and the same day just left him a not saying that she was leaving him for Larry and left 11,000 in debt....then come to find out she was planning this whole thing for a month and a half and was going to tell Woody after the restaurant went under...that was really shallow and mean and so now he is not doing so well at all and I told him that I would try and help him out as best I can...I don't know about her anymore and I seriously don't know what I am going to do when he starts abusing her again and she comes to me for help...I just don't know...that is pretty much all that I have to update on...hope atleast everyone else is having a good day..

I hate my mother....

Wed, 03 Aug 2005 20:01:03 GMT

Today has not been a good day whatsoever...it all started yesterday when apparently my mother came over to take me out to lunch but I was in class at the time so I didn't see her...well I thought it was a bit odd that she didn't just wait since I would have been out in an hour and she drove all the up from Howard City...well my instincts were telling me that she was with Larry...so Justin and I drove by there to look for her car and it was nowhere to be seen so I just wrote it off as paranoia...well this morning as I get home from work and before I was going to go to class I called her and Woody answered the phone which was odd and then he told me that she left him and moved back in with Larry on Saturday...I got extremely angry(still am) and I went over there and saw her sitting at the kitchen table crying cause she was worried about my reaction to all of this...well I just asked if we could go out to lunch and Justin went with us...we ended up going to Big Boy and I finally said ok what the hell is going on...well she told me that she was still in love with Larry and that she wanted to give it another chance after oh I don't know 10 other chances in which she said the exact same thing over and over again is that he changed...he may have changed right now but in a couple of months he will be the exact same as ever which is abusive and an asshole...not to mention Woody who is a wonderful man and should not have been hurt like this...he came over after lunch was over and he told me that he still thought of me as a daughter and I told him that I still wanted him to be part of my life because he was like the father that I never had...what the hell does it matter to my mother though...she hurt him really bad and left him with a 10,000 dollar debt from her failed restaurant...and she tells me that I have no right to say anything especially after everything that he did to me oh no I don't have any right whatsoever...well when she comes crying to me I will not be sympathetic towards her one little bit...

frustrating day...

Mon, 25 Jul 2005 23:08:48 GMT

I am a little upset today...I was supposed to get my check that is three weeks overdue today but alas it never showed up and I am a little scared cause I have bills that are due on Wednesday and hopefully I get it tomorrow so I can pay them off...things are not so hot with Justin right now...he is getting frustrated with me cause I am figuring out my own problems without him and when I do that I need alone time and he refuses to give me that but then he turns around and tells me that he needs personal time of his own...I just don't know anymore...grrrrr...I am taking a mini vacation this weekend and going to Ohio to spend a couple of days with some friends that I have down there and it will be nice...hopefully when I come back I will be recharged and ready to take on anything...well that is pretty much all that I have for now...hope everyone is having a nice day...

wolf_princess journal

Talk about a long time*sigh*...

The one I stole from Rob

yay!!!!!

The Survey

ok....

Lost

Yay...

Recovering...

....

I dropped....

Yikes....

long day...

eh...

eh....

To pass time

so very sick...

straight back to life....

Just one of those days...

I hate my mother....

frustrating day...

Talk about a long timesigh...